Symptoms

When I'm on edge, my mind and body start to fall apart. Like, today, I didn't know what day it was; just completely lost in time. I sometimes find myself thinking about things that pop up out of the blue - like, gee, I'd really like some baked potato chips just about now. Or, if I were to throw my shoe at that annoying girl in my class, what would happen? Doesn't anyone ever listen to me? Crazy randomness like that. And my body...God, there's a whole laundry list of symptoms that I'm always on the lookout for, because they signal the descent into insanity. The flesh under my left eye twitches. I get a charley horse more often than usual. I bite my nails until they're nothing but fleshy nubs. And my stomach feels like a stampede of cattle. I keep telling myself: "The things worth having are worth suffering for." That's true, isn't it?

Final thought: The things worth having are worth suffering for. God, I hope that's true.