Oh, yeah, grad school...

Noticed I don't really talk much about grad school or my grad school friends. It's not that I don't like the program or the people in it, but sometimes when I'm there, it feels like I crashed a party just as it's about to break up. Some background is needed to clarify this statement. First of all, the official name of my program is English as an International Language. I have a degree in biomedical science; you can see my dilemma. Everyone was confidently reciting the International Phonetic Alphabet and arguing the merits of rhotic versus non-rhotic accents, and I had to scramble to keep up. My knowledge of stop codons and cranial nerves was quite useless. And to top it off, most of them were old enough to be my parents. Don't get me wrong - they are a nice bunch of people. Thais are notorious for making you feel like you fit in, even when you don't, and you know it, and they know it, and the people in the next room know it. It's why we're the Land of Smiles; a smile can mean so many things. But I didn't bond with anyone, and still haven't, and frankly, I don't know if that's a problem. I get along well with them, but it's like how you get along with the man who sells you your morning newspaper - genial, but not deep. I'm at a point in my life where I feel that the energy, time and patience that needs to be dedicated to the making of new friends is way beyond my present capabilities. In simple terms - I'm content. I'm a rock, unmoveable. My best friend is out of the country and my other close friends are spread out across the globe. I have two good friends who are somehow able to tolerate me, and even when they don't bother to call me or stand me up, I'm only ever mad for like fifteen seconds (I tend to sulk longer). The point is, I have no motivation to make additional friends. That may be nuts, but I'm nuts. Maybe I'll get over it, but I highly doubt it. It's just not that point in my life, and I need most of my time to dedicate to memorizing the different foreign language teaching methods.

Final thought: It sure does suck when you need a fourth for paintball and you only have two friends in the country.