Keeping Sane
One of my biggest fears is that someday, someone, somewhere will see the whole of me, me without my defenses up, without any sort of armor, physical or psychological - and they'll run. The other week Sittha mentioned that people born on Wednesday have a hard time with trust, with trusting others and trusting. That's accurate, for me at least. Even with the people closest to me, I feel like I have to keep parts of myself closed off. I don't think I've ever revealed all of myself to anyone (has anyone in the history of the planet?) and I don't plan to, not ever. What if they're shocked? What if they don't get the significance of my gesture? What if they decide they didn't know me at all and leave me? I think everyone has things hidden that are hidden for a reason, parts of themselves they wouldn't reveal to save their lives, things you could be hanged for. I know I do. I think it's the only way to keep sane. If you gave everything up, what would there be left for you? You can't turn into someone else. You can never truly know what it's like to live in someone else's skin. I'm pretty empathetic, when I want to be, and even I have to admit, sometimes I just don't know. That's not such a bad thing, is it? It's what makes us individuals.
Final thought: You are you and I am me, and sometimes we do things differently.